Your Story

YOU ARE NOT GOING CRAZY –

Hi Everyone, this page is dedicated to your story. It’s  important that we share information to validate the suffering and reality of Emotional, Psychological Abuse by Psychopaths, Narcissists and Sociopaths. I have attached a contact form at the bottom of the page. Send your story in any way you want;  quote, poem, your story, psychological thriller, links, any helpful hints via the attached form it will allow me to ensure a safe environment to post.  Please do not worry about your writing if it needs editing that will be done without impacting on your voice. As soon as your piece is posted you will be informed.  If you wish to be kept updated on posts please follow the blog. We are in this together. xx

“You write. That’s the hard bit that nobody sees. You write on the good days and you write on the lousy days. Like a shark, you have to keep moving forward or you die. Writing may or may not be your salvation; it might or might not be your destiny. But that does not matter. What matters right now are the words, one after another.”Neil Gaiman

After  Posts – Emotional Abuse Violates Civil Rights.

‘Late in 2012, I experienced a severe destructive trauma; Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD): it is not a mental illness. It is an injury; an emotional trauma injury which continues to have a resounding impact on my life and that of my family and friends.  I had been in a psychologically abusive relationship that ended horribly impounding the abuse resulting in PTSD.’

So, I started the writing my story in *Micro Chapters in the context of a psychological thriller.  In an attempt to understand the abuse, I started the After posts which led me on a terrifying  journey to understanding emotional abuse. I hope that by sharing the information it brings you some understanding of what happened to you and offers you some validation of the abuse suffered. Every Story, Your Story will open up the reality of this type of insidious abuse and will help someone else.

After Posts – On The Edge ‘After’ is dedicated to educating the public regarding the nature of psychological abuse providing information on  personality traits of narcissists, psychopaths and sociopaths and its cost to individuals and society. The posts share professional and expert knowledge to help victims of mental abuse, understand their trauma, rebuild self-belief and self-esteem, and support them in their resolve to be free from the abuse. After seeks to support victims of psychological abuse and their families and friends.

Here is a small quote from me:

“It’s  just over two years since my mind was trapped in, and my life sucked away by my Prince of Darkness. He left me dying after strangling every last breath from my lungs.

Now I think that’s okay, it happened, I have come through the trauma and I will recover. I will find my breath easily again and find my life and move on. No, it’s not that simple. It’s an extraordinary struggle that still continues. I ask myself constantly why can’t I heal the wounds, and just learn to live with the scars. Close friends tell me it’s because you are holding onto the abuse by writing your book and the blog. I don’t agree. As soon as I shut down my blog Micro Chapters (my story) the abuse consumed me again.

I am in a tumble dry cycle –  I am hurled around, hitting against the sides of drum, erratically lacerated, mangled, being knocked and jolted about some more, not knowing how bloody long the cycle will go on for or where the next blow will be. Then suddenly, intermittently, the cycle stops.  I violently jolt to a screaming halt…………. Then, I remember that in retrospect as I gathered the evidence and recount the signposts that I missed during the tale of my abuse, the slow, insidious, sadistic rape of my mind and heart and soul. As the proof accrues, and unspeakable reality dawns, I am again knocked senseless by it; the trauma is so great, it’s unrelenting.”

After Narcissist Abuse; Depression:

By this stage the victim can hardly recognize themselves, they are quickly becoming a shadow of their former self. Living under tyranny within a war zone where they are controlled, physically and emotionally battered, unable to make decisions, subjected to constant rages, sucked dry, stripped of dignity and safety, they exist in a joyless life. They begin to feel that they can’t do anything right any more, they don’t feel that they can trust their own mind, and they withdraw with a skewed reality of what is really taking place. They escape into depression. Many victims will also go on to experience Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD). The diagnosis of PTSD can be made based on certain symptoms being present, and these symptoms fall into three categories:

1.Reliving: (Flashbacks, intrusive imagery, nightmares, anxiety etc)
2. Avoidance: (Avoiding people, places or thoughts, emotional numbing, lack of interest, hopelessness etc).
3. Arousal: (Difficulty concentrating, irritability, outbursts of anger, insomnia, hyper-vigilance etc).

In my work with Narcissistic Victim Syndrome I have noticed that the victims were brought to the place of annihilation and death on many levels of the self while experiencing gaslighting behaviour in their narcissistic relationships. When we take on the journey of recovery together, I take care and time to educate the individual as to what was happening to them as their story unfolds. I am always meet with an array of responses, from shock, disbelief, profound sadness, guilt, shame, anger, fear, reflection, loneliness and an array of physical symptoms (panic attacks, flashbacks, anxious negative thoughts, fatigue, eating disorders, dissociation, abreaction etc.), but they also express relief at finally knowing what had been going on in the relationship, and the amount of “losses” they were dealing with. I think many of the stages are very similar to Elisabeth Kübler-Ross stages of grief, which are Denial, Anger, Bargaining, Depression, and Acceptance. But still, I find that the individual holds the key to even more strategies for guarding the various levels of defense that I have mentioned here. I am always amazed at how surprisingly resilient these victims are. All our strategies for surviving are incredibly intelligent, and together (the client and I) welcome each and every one as a teacher for our learning and understanding. When this happens, it allows for all the fragmented parts of the soul to return home where they become like special guests at a glorious Banquet, one unifying whole sitting at the Table of Recovery. When a therapist experiences this work they will truly appreciate and understand the deep suffering these victims have gone through daily. The fact that these clients have survived the torturous effects of the disorganized narcissistic personality disorder is in itself a miracle, and a testament to the human spirit.

Shared from: The RoadShow for Therapists

Meet Me

Do You Believe that Emotional Abuse should be criminalized? 

**Due to pending legal action I have had to stop writing Micro Chapters the truth about my abusive relationship. It is now in the process of being published as a book in early spring 2015.

**Please note I am not a psychological professional.  The ‘After Posts’ content  is formed to support, not replace, medical or psychiatric treatment. If you suffered or are suffering psychological abuse and not coping; suffering sever anxiety; not sleeping; fearful; unsettled;  please seek qualified professional care. 

Please note you must provide a legitimate email address.

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