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"But where do you go to my lovely
When you're alone in your bed
Won't you tell me the thoughts that surround you I want to look inside your head, yes I do." #songlyrics #eventide_love  #lostinlove #mindlessbehavior #mindgames #mystory #amwriting #psychologicalthriller based around #emotionalabuse  #follownow #Blog bio link in bio. #ireland🇮🇪 #bookblogger a Psychological Thriller based around emotional abuse; -
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"I kissed him like he was my God, and I his protector. I kissed him with a desperate, dark wildness. I kissed him hard with my tongue, my teeth in utter abandonment. A storm built in both of us as he laid siege to my desire, his hands sliding down my body, clasping my ass, entering me with a savage drive. At that moment we became lost in our universe as two uncomplicated fucking beasts. In that flash instant, he intoxicated me in a frenzied desire for his sheer physical strength, for his passion, for his stimulation, my life fueled by his breath. I convulsed from the savagery of his kisses, his fucking, penetrating with callous intent and right then I knew I could never be without this man in my life. My intellect captured, frenzied lust exploding as he pummelled me I clung on fucking him as if my life depended on it. It was that one fuck." #emotionalabuse as a #psychologicalthriller #amwriting #mystory #writingismyfreedom #writinglife #badlove #psyco #thrillerbooks Pain of a Silent Cry  #eventide_love Psychological Thriller- follow link for the story. . "I am struggling to surface from a limited perspective of my one-dimensional life with Chris. My life is falling apart; I am fading like a dying bulb into darkness. I am terrified of the future without Chris but even more terrified of my life with him." #psychologicalthriller #emotionalabuse #mystory #writinglife #thrillerbooks #amwriting #writingmystory #readers #artwork_artist #peterallert #saatchiartist #livewithart #artcollector Shades of Danger & Adventure - sums up life in emotional abuse. "There were many shades in the danger of adventures and gales, most of which were exhilarating and golden. It is only now and then that there appears on the face of facts a sinister violence of intention- that indefinable something which forces it upon the mind and the heart." "I could see no images only shades of light
I spread my arms out over the abyss

my heart’s rhythm was so slow
there was no need to inhale
my soul on the edge of the abyss
strands of obscure light from the heart of the earth
reached out and attached to my skin hugging me
I embraced the powerful draw of the abyss
the light fading and dying, I looked up and saw you." "Most victims keep their abusers secrets; they count on that, knowing exposing them exposes our failings. Telling about what happened to you is a powerful healing force that can dispel the shame of being a victim. Remember; the perversion belongs to the perpetrator and so does the shame." I write Emotional Abuse as a Psychological Thriller. #amwriting #truestory💯 #psychologicalabuse #mentalabuse #eventide_love #ireland🍀 #alfredhitchcock #davidlynch #amwritingfiction #bloglife

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Narcissistic Repercussion

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At the end of a relationship the Narcissist faces potential exposure of his abusive behavior Your leaving/ending and loss of expected NS (Narcissistic Supply), ensuing separation/divorce, financial repercussions, can result in narcissistic injury and subsequent narcissistic rage. His targets find themselves on the receiving end of the Narcissist’s relentless abuse, smear campaign, endless legal battles and other creative cruelties. This narcissistic rage may be, in fact, much worse than what you experienced within the relationship.

Victims may have experienced severe physical or psychological abuse. That abuse, of course, is hidden behind closed doors. Seldom is there proof or witnesses.

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Biased or ignorant courts may fail to recognize N tactics and victims may find no justice in the legal system. Some victims will now be dealing with the ‘sport litigator’s’ endless courtroom abuse. This N will not hesitate to pay top dollar in legal fees to obtain the benefit of the high-octane spotlight of attention the courts provide. He will not be concerned in any way with your financial/emotional needs. The preservation of his image and NS is now all-important.

Interfering with the Narcissist’s distorted sense of of his personal entitlement produces the Narcissist rage. 

Even the victim’s relatives, friends, and colleagues are amenable to the considerable charm, persuasiveness, and manipulativeness of the abuser and to his impressive thespian skills. The abuser offers a plausible rendition of the events and interprets them to his favor. Others rarely have a chance to witness an abusive exchange first hand and at close quarters. In contrast, the victims are often on the verge of a nervous breakdown: harassed, unkempt, irritable, impatient, abrasive, and hysterical.”

Confronted with this contrast between a polished, self-controlled, and suave abuser and his harried casualties it is easy to reach the conclusion that the real victim is the abuser, or that both parties abuse each other equally. The prey’s acts of self-defense, assertiveness, or insistence on her rights are interpreted as aggression, lability, or a mental health problem.
Narcissism by Proxy: Dr. Sam Vaknin

Dr. Ernest Wolf on the Narcissistic Rage:
The narcissistically injured on the other hand, cannot rest until he has blotted out a vaguely experienced offender who dared to oppose him, to disagree with him, or to outshine him. It can never find rest because it can never wipe out the evidence that has contradicted its conviction it is unique and perfect. This archaic rage goes on and on and on.

Narcissistic rage occurs in many forms. They all share, however, a specific psychological flavor which gives them a distinct position within the wide realm of human aggressions. The need for revenge, for righting a wrong, for undoing a hurt by whatever means, and a deeply anchored, unrelenting compulsion in the pursuit of all these aims, which gives no rest to those who have suffered a narcissistic injury -these are the characteristic features of narcissistic rage in all its forms and which set it apart from other kinds of aggression.

Narcissistic rage is a horse of a different color. Sometimes conditions occur which make a person feel totally helpless and powerless. This is an unbearable experience and results in that individual’s unlimited rage to destroy – destroy any opponent, anyone who is not for me is against me, destroy the world, etc. Unfortunately, this narcissistic rage does not disappear when the helplessness or powerlessness have disappeared. Rather, this type of rage goes on, and on, and on, and only very gradually sort of wears itself out. Disruption-Restoration

Source – Abuse Recovery

Group Helplessness and Rage Ernest S. Wolf, MD

This is a poem I wrote at the end of my relationship .

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Lawyers letter
huddled in moonlight shadow
Chablis drowned despair
nights darkness
Darkness of my reality

Related Posts – After

Meet the Author – On The Edge

Female Narcissists – Men and women are both victims. This site is written from my experience that of a woman. It fully acknowledges the female narcissist and the chaos and destruction that can be caused to men in such an abusive relationship.

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