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Eventide Love this is my story. In a speech at Wheaton College, Massachusetts, Carl Sagan spoke of how we humans share 99.6% of our active genes with chimpanzees. He described male chimps as aggressive and female chimps as non-aggressive. When under stress or threatened, male chimps become angry, pick up stones and hold them in their palms to hurl at the target. Female chimps, he tells us, walks up to the angry males, pry open their fingers, removes the stones, and drop them on the ground. I tried to take the stones from his hands; I tried talking, texting, writing, believing, settling, begging, tears and anger. I always tried to be the peacemaker, to give him what he wanted while attempting to maintain some dignity. That was unacceptable to him; he wanted to control the terms completely. His terms harmed me. It carried on. Every time I tried to kill the flame, he would always reignite it. My instinct for survival made me realize that unless he was crushed completely the flame would never go out. #eventide_love ; : : #psychologicalthriller #psychological #thriller #thrillers #amwriting #mystory #myblog #emotionalabuse #hitchcock #davidlynch #blogtobook #writingblog
When words have lost their meaning @outlines_arturo : : : : #sothebys #sothebyshongkong #eventide_love #amwriting #mystory #emotionalabuse #livewithart #artandlife #psychologicalthriller #davidlynch #hitchcock #alfredhitchcock
My #eventide_love. “Oh-oh-oh-oh-ooh! Oh-oh-ooh-oh-oh-oh! Caught in a bad romance.” Link in profile. : : : #amwriting #mystory #emotionalabuse as a #psychologicalthriller #thrillerbooks #ladygaga #quoted #blogto #book #ireland🍀
“Cause I am your lady And you are my man Whenever you reach for me I'll do all that I can We're heading for something Somewhere I've never been Sometimes I am frightened But I'm ready to learn The power of love” #poweroflove #eventide_love #psychologicalthriller link in profile Blog to Book. : #artwork🎨 #louijover : : : : #amwriting #mystory #emotionalabuse as a #psychological #thriller #psychologicalabuse #hitchcock #davidlynch #mentalabuse #ireland🍀 #writingchallenge #blogto #book #bookclub
My Blog to Book is about completed. It's been hard getting here. I have left behind the person that I once was, I have changed from the person I once knew, I've wasted days and nights on rotten love. I've traded happiness for sad, and trust for paranoia. But I believe as I complete my pilgrimage it will come right again. This is the story of emotional abuse as a psychological thriller. https://eventidepsychologicalthriller.com/2015/02/16/ontheedge-eventide-short-story-5/
"No one will see it. No one will know. And eventually all of the scars will have scars, and that's all I will become --one big scar of his bad love.” My story #emotionalabuse as a #psychologicalthriller blog to book. http://bit.ly/Psychothrill : : #psychological #thriller #amwriting #mystory #creativewriter #emotionalrollercoaster #davidlynch #hitchcock #mindgames

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For the last three years, I have been writing this blog about recovering from emotional abuse. About being strong, finding your independence, fighting for your life, confronting emotional abuse. This year brought on a whole new struggle.

“Now I find myself even more lost than I ever was.
You know I always stay up without sleeping,
And think to myself,
Where do I belong forever,
In whose arms, and place?

I’m burning inside, nobody understands my language,
We all wanna be different, but we doing the same shit,
Wear the same clothes, same chains, same cars,
Got the same goals, wanna be the same stars,
Same heart break, we carry the same dreams,
I carry the same dreams!
There’s no real friends just delusive smiling faces

All around me are familiar faces,
Worn out places
Worn out faces
Always judging
I hide my head
I want to drown my sorrow
No tomorrow
No tomorrow

My energy is slipping away

And only I know.”

And the reality is: only you know your depth of despair. I am fight hard not to give into my tribulations and keep going. I have good days, but by god I have bad days, one thing I do know is I  battle on as hard as I can. I believe I will feel the love again. I will live life again without pain.

I am writing this because I know from all the messages I get that so many of you recover and then struggle again. I am no different. None of us know what life’s journey is going to throw at us. But what I do know is I hold my head high through all my reactions to what lands on my plate and keep going. You can do the same, keep battling. Conjure up the positive in your life in your mind, no matter how rocky you feel kick those pebbles out of the way. It’s your life, break through the shit and make it happen.

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Autumn Hill

by Hannah Adamaszek

Featured Image: Waters Way by Hannah Adamaszek

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